Bitter Pill
by lilcupcake03
Summary: Ivy and Derek try to navigate their relationship and try to stay together with everything tearing them apart. Will they get there Happy Ever After? ***ON HIATUS***
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimers: I own nothing. This is merely fiction and what I wish would happen! Team Ivy all the way! (This takes place immediately after season one ends and I'm bringing in bits from what I saw from the season 2 trailer.)

Author's Note: This is not BETA-ed if there are issues and they bother anyone too much feel free to step up. ENJOY!

Bitter Pill

Chapter One:

As Karen Cartwright's voice carried through the theater Ivy Lynn dumped a handful of pills into her palm, staring them down. She never thought becoming Marilyn Monroe even for a mere few months would have her going down the same destructive path.

"Ivy." Derek Wills' voice came from right behind her, causing Ivy to startle and the pills to scatter.

She turned to face her boyfriend with a mix of emotions: fear, shame, bitterness, and sadness. She took a breath before speaking. "What?"

"What are you doing?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest as his eyes darted to the pills that littered the floor.

"Don't you have Karen, your new Marilyn, to fawn over?" Ivy shot back, gathering the pills and throwing them in the trash.

"Ivy, don't act like this, so childish. It's beneath you." Derek said simply, gathering Ivy into his arms.

"How is it beneath me if I'm no one? I'm certainly not a star, not Marilyn." Ivy said, pushing out of his arms and sitting down at her station.

"Darling," Derek's breath caressed her ear. "You are a star. You may not be Marilyn for the preview, but that doesn't mean you won't get your chance to be her on Broadway." This was stated as his arms came around her shoulders, closing around her. Ivy's eyes widened, meeting Derek's in the mirror. Derek's eyes danced with mischief as a smile curved his lips.

"I may see Karen for Marilyn for the preview, for something small, to get her feet wet. But for you, I see big things. You will have your shot. I will see to it." Derek assured her.

Ivy cradled her face in her hands as she absorbed Derek's plan. She definitely didn't see it coming. But, then again, Derek kept her in the dark about most things. She sighed.

"You may not want to 'see to it' if I tell you what happened the other night." she said.

Derek stood back and crossed his arms over his body. "What happened the other night?" he asked.

"I slept with Dev." Ivy said, meeting Derek's eyes. She wanted to see his reaction, wondering if it would even matter to him.

"Dev?" Derek's mouth curved into a sneer as he echoed the name. "Karen's Dev? Why on Earth would you do that?"

"I did it because I was angry, hurt, and drunk." Ivy replied.

"You were angry? Why were you angry?" Derek asked.

"Because you slept with Rebecca! Twice! All while completely ignoring me and our plans together!" Ivy shouted, throwing her arms out in exasperation.

Derek merely sighed, "I thought we covered this." He crossed his arms once again. "We're professionals above all things. Nothing gets in the way of the show." Derek's face showed no emotion of the mention of Ivy's dalliance with Dev.

"I may be a professional, but I have feelings! Which you obviously don't!" Ivy spat back, she grabbed her coat and purse, storming out of the room before Derek could stop her.

Derek watched Ivy go, arms still crossed over his chest. After a few moments, he sighed. Derek knew himself to be jaded. Having talent and knowing what to do with it, lent itself to having the world at your finger tips and getting whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted, even whoever you wanted.

As he went back to the stage where the cast and crew were already celebrating, Derek felt no mood. His spirit lifted slightly as he saw Karen glowing like a beacon, shining brighter than anyone in the room. He'd be lying to say he had no romantic feelings towards her. There were some, she was one of the rare innocents in the jaded world he lived. Plus she was the only one who ever turned him down flat.

Karen raced towards Derek and launched herself into his arms. He took a moment and thought about how she felt in his arms. It was nice, but it wasn't Ivy. Pulling her back, he smiled. "How pleased are we, Darling?" he asked.

"This was amazing!" Karen said, "Such a rush!" she beamed brightly. Linda handed them both champagne.

As the rest of cast and crew surrounded them, one person was notably absent: Ivy. Murmurs instantly clouded the celebration and people tried to reach her on her cell to no answer.

Before panic set in, Derek spoke. "Ivy just needed air and a few moments to herself; please don't worry. Let the celebration begin!" he said jubilantly, although he felt the opposite on the side. Music began to play and the music and the party began in full swing.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimers: I own nothing. This is merely fiction and what I wish would happen! Team Ivy all the way! (This takes place immediately after season one ends and I'm bringing in bits from what I saw from the season 2 trailer.)

Author's Note: This story is not BETA-ed if there is any big issues, please be gentle or offer up your own services. Thanks!

Bitter Pill

Chapter Two:

Ivy sighed. She couldn't believe she found herself willingly going back. But this is where she needed to be. She knocked on the ornate front door and found herself face to face with her mother Leigh Conroy. Leigh gaped in surprise before she caught herself.

"Honey, what are you doing here? Why aren't you celebrating with the cast and crew?" she asked as she ushered her daughter inside.

Ivy shocked them both by bursting into body shaking sobs. Leigh held Ivy tight until the tears subsided and she was able to lead Ivy upstairs to her bedroom.

"Maybe you were right." Ivy said with a hollow voice as she sat down on her childhood pink canopied bed. "I'm just not talented enough to make it in this business. Ten years in the chorus should have been my first clue."

"I've told you your day will come." Leigh said as soothingly as she could, lightly stroking Ivy's hair. "This just wasn't it. Tomorrow will be a new one."

"Thank you." Ivy said her voice still hollow. She handed her mother her cell phone. "Please take this; I need some time to regroup and center myself. I'm not here if anyone asks or come looking. But seeing as I'm not a star, I don't think anyone will miss me."

Ivy curled on her side and closed her eyes; Leigh walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. Admittedly she wasn't the world's best mother but this time she was going to do whatever it took to protect her daughter this time.

The party raged on around him, but Derek was bothered that Ivy hadn't reappeared. All his calls went to voicemail. He sighed and headed for the door, Eileen caught him at the door.

"Is everything alright with Ivy?" she asked gently.

"She seemed fine when she left but her phone is shut off." He explained, worry ringing in his voice.

"She had her heart toyed with tonight. That's one of the worst things about this business. Just give her some time to heal." She said knowingly, patting his arm as Nick brought Eileen a drink and captured her attention. With that, Derek slipped out into the crisp Boston evening.

Derek went straight to the hotel, packed his things. He checked out and booked a flight back to New York. He swung by Ivy's apartment, still having the key. He was surprised when he discovered it was empty. Even more worried but not knowing where they stood, he left the key on the counter, locked the door behind him and headed to his apartment.

Once in his apartment, in bed, he tried Ivy again and got nothing. Giving up, he shut his phone off and rolled over, hoping sleep would find him. He awoke early the next morning after disastrous sleep and checked his cell phone and where there was a mixture of congratulations and questions about Ivy.

Derek swore and threw the phone down on the bed and ran his fingers through his hair as he headed downstairs. He went into the kitchen and hit play on his stereo system and wasn't surprised when Ivy's voice poured out as she sang out 'Never give all your heart'.

He like the rest of the world saw the leaked performance and was instantly intrigued. When Eileen approached him, it was a chance to see her skills live. He was blown away, but blew her off at first. Not knowing what to make of her, being in the biz for so long and being so friendly and optimistic, threw him off balance. But soon, after the auditions began he learned there was so much more to Ivy and her fight for perfection was refreshing.

Learning all of Ivy's dalliance with Dev didn't change anything. It bothered him on the strictly on the British side of things. He hated Dev and his attitude from day one. That was what bothered him more; that Dev had his hands on Ivy. Not the other way around. In hind sight, Ivy had every right to be upset and angry and have something stupid happen.

When he met Karen, he figured the naïve 24 year old from Iowa would be an easy lay but boy did she prove him wrong. He liked her spirit, her fire, and yes, her innocence. She wasn't jaded like most of the women he'd met, conquered, or even dated in the past. But her innocence wouldn't last in this world. Being jaded was almost mandatory in the business they were in.

Though he didn't see Ivy as Marilyn for the preview he'd hoped once they got to Broadway he could get her in the spotlight. Ivy was too talented to be ignored for ten years. He wanted to do right by her, though he rarely showed it: he cared deeply for Ivy. More so than he had for anyone in years; it was rare when a woman was able to show him a trick or two on and off the stage. He enjoyed her company, her brain, and her body. Someday he hoped he'd get to show Ivy that.

When Ivy awoke she was groggy and confused. As she stared at the pink canopy everything became clear again. She sighed, stretched, and rolled out of bed and saw it just shy of three in the morning. She quietly headed down stairs to the kitchen and fixed herself a glass of warm milk. Her cell phone was on the table. She was tempted to pick it up but figured it would only wind her up more when she was trying to get back to sleep and forget everything, at least for a little while. Humming 'Never give all your Heart' Ivy headed back to her bedroom where she changed into pajamas, sipped her milk and got comfortable in bed. She closed her eyes and let the darkness engulf her.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimers: I own nothing. This is merely fiction and what I wish would happen! Team Ivy all the way! (This takes place immediately after season one ends and I'm bringing in bits from what I saw from the season 2 trailer and the premiere. God bless the internet!)

Author's Note: This story is not BETA-ed if there is any big issues, please be gentle or offer up your own services. Thanks!

Bitter Pill

Chapter Three:

When Ivy awoke the next morning her mother was waiting for her with a cup of coffee in the kitchen. They took their coffee and settled in the den as Ivy told her mother everything, from Derek's dalliance with Rebecca mixed with the utterance of the "L" word to her getting drunk and sleeping with Karen's fiancé then shoving it in her face out of a mixture of truth and revenge.

For once Leigh listened without saying a word. After Ivy finished, she sighed. "Darling," she said softly. "What happened with Derek isn't surprising. He's a talent director; he's just as jaded as Rebecca. This is what happens; they will do whatever they feel necessary to get their project underway. Now for you, I can't say I approve of what you did. But I understand why. Can I offer you a bit of advice?"

Ivy put her coffee aside and looked her mother in the eye. "Please."

"Go back, finish out the show. You can't afford any more mistakes after Heaven on Earth. Try to talk to Karen. As for Derek, I still really don't think you should let him go. You work well together; there is a spark between you. Give him another chance."

Leigh handed Ivy her phone and she saw it was back on. There were texts messages from Tom, Sam, and Jessica there was also voicemails. The first was from Eileen; the second was Lyle; the third and fourth were from Derek.

She read and listened to them all. She got back to everyone and left Derek for last. As she listened to the ringing of the phone, she noticed her mom had her bags neatly packed and waiting for by the door. As the voicemail beep she tried to keep her voice strong.

"Derek, it's me, Ivy. I'm coming back to Boston. Thanks for wanting to help me but I can do it on my own, like I have been. I love you but I think it's for the best. See you soon." She hung up and looked at her mom who smiled faintly.

Leigh took her hands and kissed her cheek. "Good Luck, darling." She said guided her out the door and on her way.

Derek got Ivy's voicemail and packed and headed back to Boston. They were back within an hour of each other. Bobby, Sam, and Jessica were instantly by Ivy's side as she spilled her guts to the in her hotel room and they put their heads together and tried to properly say how sorry Ivy was for ruining everything.

Hours later, Ivy found Karen alone in the dressing room staring at the wedding ring Dev had offered her and Ivy had returned to her. Guilt instantly hit Ivy in the stomach like a fist.

"Karen?" Ivy said hesitantly. Karen turned and glared at Ivy, her eyes full of venom.

"What do you want now Ivy?" Karen snapped her usual warm voice ice cold.

"I wanted to apologize for everything, from the bottom of my heart. I never meant to hurt you." Ivy said softly, wringing her hands.

"Sure." Karen spat and walked out of the dressing room, slamming the door behind her.

Ivy sunk to the floor and cried knowing she could possibly loose all she worked so hard for. She wanted to make it right, she had to. Standing, she dried her eyes and stared herself in the mirror. And she would, no matter what it took.

For three weeks Ivy tried to make amends to Karen and her pleas fell on deaf ears all the while she watched Karen draw Derek closer. The whole company saw it and there were no secrets among the bunch. Karen was Derek's Marilyn "muse" and he did whatever he pleased to make her happy, aside from having sex. But he frozen Ivy out as well, no doubts by Karen's will.

Ivy leaned on Bobby and Sam for support but it seemed she lost Jessica to Karen's shine. Ivy spent the remainder of her nights in Boston alone. Derek answered maybe one or two of her texts but he was a curt as cruel as she knew him to be. She sighed and took it as they were over and didn't allow herself to be put through any more of his cruelty.

Every night she put on a brave face and performed to the best of her ability because that's what she was born to do and no one would take that from her.

When they got back to New York, Ivy sought advice from Bobby, Sam, and surprisingly Julia but she needed a dose of truth and at the party to try to keep Bombshell afloat she caught Karen and Derek in a compromising position but Derek ran after her, assuring her there was nothing sexual but promptly firing her because that's what Karen wished.

That was the awakening Ivy needed, she needed to move on and she found Karen and told her as much and for a second saw the Karen who started out in Marilyn, not the jaded person she was becoming. Ivy went home and made plans to start auditioning for the on ensemble again until she got her confidence back but when came to her apartment she found a drunk Derek waiting for her. She hung up from her call with Sam and they had a heart to heart and he gave her one hell of a pep talk, despite her gut warning she felt a flutter of maybe they could get back together again.

When Eileen called, Ivy was all too happy to help, to sing and play Marilyn even if it was just for a moment. She gave the performance of her life and enjoyed it before running out into the night with Derek. He was still drunk as hell and they enjoyed some more laughs. She left him safely at his apartment and went home, making a plan to bring him breakfast in the morning to mend fences further.

However when Ivy gave Derek his breakfast and thanked him for giving her confidence back, he was grumpy yet charming, usual for nursing a hangover. When she found out Karen and Derek were in a work meeting and fully clothed she was slightly intrigued but glad he didn't blow her off. But when Karen asked what that was about and she heard him loud and clear dismiss her as "Nothing" she felt her heart break over him a final time and bowed her head.

Once again when she was safe in her own apartment, she thought over her audition and her song choice and how perfect it had been for everything: Bombshell, Derek, and her future with the show. She hoped this audition would bring her the change she needed as the tears fell once more and for the last time.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimers: I own nothing. This is merely fiction and what I wish would happen! Team Ivy all the way! (This takes place immediately after season one ends and I'm bringing in bits from what I see from Season 2, in this case Episode 6 "The Fringe" and mentions from the preview for the next episode. God bless the internet!)

Author's Note: This story is not BETA-ed if there is any big issues, please be gentle or offer up your own services. Thanks!

Bitter Pill

Chapter Four:

_"Only thank me if it works!" Derek said as Ivy took her bag and headed off._

It was the wee hours of the morning but Derek's words still echoed in her head as his advice, did indeed, work. The show might not actually suck as it made its way to Broadway. The entire cast of Liaisons stayed up late working on how to make the show good again. It was still a work in progress but she was now no longer planning her funeral. Thanks to Derek.

She sighed and picked up her phone and hit speed dial. "Hello Darling." Derek's accented voice answered. She could tell by the tone that he was drunk.

"Am I calling at a bad time?" she asked with a nervous laugh.

"No, no. I am currently walking home. I had drinks with Scott Nichols, Jimmy and Kyle. I quit directing Bombshell today and am now directing Hit List." He explained.

"Wow. I didn't think you'd drop Bombshell, especially with your Marilyn starring." Ivy said with surprise.

"Well I'm hoping she jumps ship too. I saw her in this as I once did as Marilyn. You were right." Derek said.

"I guess she really is your muse." Ivy said sadly.

"On the stage, yes, she is. In my bed, no, she is not. No one has moved me since you in that department." Derek admitted.

"Well that's oddly sweet and good to know." Ivy said honestly, resting her hand she didn't know she balled into a fist on her knee. She relaxed it.

"You should come over and come to bed with me." Derek said wistfully.

"I would, if you were sober." Ivy answered, as she mentally kicked herself.

"Well I could be sober if I walked to your place instead of mine." Derek said.

"Derek, don't be ridiculous. My place is at least 20 blocks from where you are and I refuse to let you walk here if your drunken stupor just cause you want to get laid." Ivy said, cooler heads prevailing. "If you remember this conversation when you're sober, then you are more than welcome to come in to my bed."

While her strength remained, she hung up the phone. She rested the phone against her lips then set it aside and crawled into bed. She had tech in the morning; the last thing she needed to worry about was getting tangled with Derek again.

The next morning, Derek woke up with a hangover but with a renewed spirit. As he did every morning, he checked his phone and discovered he was the last person he spoke with was Ivy. He vaguely remembered their conversation, him asking her to go to bed with him and her refusing while he was drunk. She was right to, he decided. Given all they've gone through, he didn't want to do that to her.

He dialed her number and got voicemail, "Good morning, Ivy. I recall our conversation and I still stand by it. I guess you called me with a point considering my parting words when we previously spoke where 'thank me when I'm right.' Call me back, tell me about it. Say, over lunch? Let me know."

After they called for lunch, Ivy checked her phone and listened to Derek's message, her lips curved to a smile. She called Derek and they arranged to meet a bistro half way between her work space and his. Ivy got there first so she got a table and discreetly checked her hair and make-up. As she tucked her compact in her purse, Derek arrived.

"Hello Ivy, you look wonderful." He greeted and kissed her somewhere between her cheek and lips. He was testing the line to see how she'd react, given their banter the night before.

Derek was pleased to see her smile. They ordered and as they waited for their meal Ivy told Derek of her success in getting her show back on track and giving a performance people were raving about. When their meal came Derek broached a subject he wasn't sure the answer to.

"So if Karen does go to Hit List, will you go back to Bombshell?" Derek asked. Ivy paused, her fork almost to her mouth.

She set the fork back down and cleared her throat, "Who would be directing if it isn't you?" she asked.

"Tom." Derek said.

"Tom? Really? Well he is a good director. He did wonders with directing me for my audition for Cecile. He does make a good choice for Bombshell too, being a part of it since its inception." Ivy mused.

"Hey!" Derek said, slightly offended.

"Sorry Derek, I went to ask you but you wanted me to critique Karen and were so wrapped up in her I couldn't be bothered. So that's why I left and asked Tom and he was wonderful as a director." Ivy explained, looking away.

Derek could see she was hurt. "I'm sorry, Ivy. Truly, but I was the same with you." He said.

"No, you weren't. You were cruel and condescending. I'm honestly surprised you two haven't slept together." Ivy said looking back at Derek. "I hope you meant what you said last night about me."

Derek took her hand, "I do. I'm sorry about how things ended but I do care for you, Ivy. More than I have for anyone then I have in a long time." He kissed her hand and caressed it gently.

Ivy felt her heart give that slow tumble again as she fell once again for Derek. Inwardly, she cursed and hoped she wouldn't get hurt again.


End file.
